Showing posts with label Bill Clinton. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bill Clinton. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Really Desperate Whitehouse Wives

We’re heading into season finale and series cliffhanger time on television, so why not put forward a few scenarios to save a cancellation of the Clinton campaign?

#1: Just before the Super Delegates make their votes final on June 4, Bill is taken into hospital with a suspected heart attack. Hillary is at his hospital bedside, just like Rocky did for Adrienne. The Super Delegates get out the sympathy vote and she wins 75% of them. She wins the nomination and Bill miraculously recovers.

#2: Just after June 3, Obama is in the lead and begins to prepare a speech for accepting the nomination. However, an old flame suddenly appears just before the speech and everybody is stunned. Hillary comes to the rescue by saying that Obama, despite his past, is a good man. The Super Delegates drop Obama and run to Hillary. She humbly accepts the crown and asks the people to pray for her opponent and his family.

#3: Aliens land in Denver during the Convention. Obama and most of the Super Delegates are disintegrated with ray guns. Hillary comes out fighting like a modern Joan of Arc and ends up defeating the aliens with her shrill tones and laser beam eyes. What’s left of the Democrat Party nominate her as their leader for life.

#4: Obama goes down a mine shaft in West Virginia trying to impress voters. The mine collapses and no one can rescue the miners or Obama. Hillary suspends her campaign and seeks to comfort Michelle. Hillary even tries to dig Obama out of the mine and the country sees an image of her with mascara ridden tears and bloodied finger nails covered in coal dust. She wins the nomination, the Whitehouse, the Nobel Peace Prize and is asked to become President of the United Nations within four years. Only green kryptonite can hold her back.

#5: Florida and Michigan are given back their delegates and the ACLU successfully wins a lawsuit entitling Hillary to be given all the votes that were cast for her in the two States. After recounting, Hillary squeaks through a win.

#6: Hillary, Bill, and Chelsea sit at a dinner table in a New York spaghetti joint and say nothing. The screen goes blank and the credits start rolling. End of story.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Chill Out, Folks!

Bill Clinton is offering advice to Democrat supporters...


Chill Out, Folks

...but it just might be too little, too late.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Political Cartoons: Sequel or Re-Run???

So what's the great Clinton plan for 21st century, post 9/11 America?


Sequel or Re-run

Take us all back to the Roaring Nineties...

Wake Up, America! We Live in a PC (Post Clinton) World!


No matter how much we want to deny it, 9/11 changed everything. If we think that the stale political ideals of the 2Oth Century still apply today, then we may as well change our name to the Republic of Rip van Winkle. Hillary Clinton is a tired rehash of the nineties, which she is still living in.

Her ideas for the 21st century? She wants to take us Back to the Future.

Hillary and Bill are a Boomer fairy tale just wanting to relive the Nostalgic Nineties. The good ol’ boy and his missus want us to believe that when he was president, we lived in the Good Ol’ Days. What a bunch of bunkum and baloney!

Think about it, folks. Do we really want to go back to turning the Whitehouse into a lair of liars who polarized the country?

Do we want to abandon our mighty military to the decisions of liberal lawyers who hog tied our forces at Mogadishu and see Black Hawks tumbling down?

Do we once again want a leader who has an international terrorist in his sights, but chooses to let him go, only to see the bloody fanatic orchestrate the destruction of the World Trade Center?

Are we once more going to see the Whitehouse filled with lobbyists and donors, corrupt cronies and elite sycophants who feel as though they’re entitled to rule over the people?

And do we really want to see Bill not having sex with interns and desecrating the Whitehouse as his own playboy mansion? If we do, then we want a reality show instead of real leadership.

Wake up, people! We live in a PC (Post Clinton) world! Do we want chains or change? The Clintons will chain us to their nostalgic, dynastic, 20th century past. It’s about time that we the people and voters cast them aside and moved on into the future. We live in the 21st century after all!

Monday, January 14, 2008

Political Cartoons: Two Can Play at That Game

The Clintons have either upped the ante...


Two can play at that game

...or they're seeing Obama's call.

Hillary Clinton is endorsed by a black billionaire, but Obama has already beaten her to it!

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Political Cartoons: Bill Clinton's Book of Fairy tales

Bill Clinton has stated that Obama's success and campaign is the biggest fairy tale he has ever heard....

Fairy Tales for Politicians

...oh yeah? What about President Pinnochio in the nineties????

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Political Cartoon: Hillary's Latest Defense

Hillary Clinton is totally ready for tomorrow night's Democrat debate in Las Vegas...

Hillary's Defense

...and for what usually happens afterwards.

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Political cartoon: Bill's Bully Pulpit

Bill Clinton is a bit upset with Hillary Clinton's poor performance last week.

Bill's Bully Pulpit

Now he's busy trying to get the rules of debate changed...just like the Clintons.

Boop boop be doop!

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Political cartoon: Looking Like Lovebirds

Hillary went ga-ga all over Bill today...


Looking like Lovebirds

...anything to do with the polls? Trying to get the "love on the rocks" vote?

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Clinton by Clinton

The more things change...

Clinton by Clinton

...the more they remain the same.